"What are YOU looking at?"
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
A man set before him a blank sheet of paper and scrawled "I WILL" at the top.
He sat upright, resolute and unmovable. A rhythmic moment passed before he drew both ends of the paper and, with squinted eyes and precision only limited by human hand, folded the paper in perfect fourths. He gently slid the paper in the coat pocket nearest to his heart. He stood, nodded, then marched out into the snow. His greying mustache resembled something of a smile.
He sat upright, resolute and unmovable. A rhythmic moment passed before he drew both ends of the paper and, with squinted eyes and precision only limited by human hand, folded the paper in perfect fourths. He gently slid the paper in the coat pocket nearest to his heart. He stood, nodded, then marched out into the snow. His greying mustache resembled something of a smile.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
On the Use and Misuse of "Literally"
The wise Marshall Hunt and I have, on occasion, discussed the misuse of this problematic word. The questions preposed: have years of misuse altered its meaning for the greater public? Is it slang? We have also seen this with words like, "random". Marshall noted that it is a peeve of his when people use "random" as a sort of catch-all adjective describing any sort of unexpected circumstance. He claims that, while unexpectedness is a quality of a random event, not all unexpected things are truly random.
Popular misuse of "literally" has been similarly appropriated in American neo-descriptive language. Yet, where "random" succeeds in a slang context, "literally" fails. This is because when misused, it is, by definition, used in a directly contradictory way. So why is it so frequently misused? Most people could probably tell you its true definition, yet that hasn't prevented this phenomenon.
Perhaps it is because "literally" is now used to create emphasis on a predicate rather than clarify it. For example: "I was so hungry, I literally could have eaten a horse." Here, "literally" is meant to intensify the degree of hunger, as if the (ironically) figurative expression wasn't sufficient, rather than to mean with certainty that one could truly consume an entire horse from extreme hunger. Marshall and I have agreed that the word "literally" owns certain phonetic and linguistically prosodic properties that instigate this error.
1. It has four syllables with the stress occurring on the first, like other emphatic words, "seriously" and "actually". Three syllable emphatic words like, "totally" and "honestly" also contribute.
2. It ends in "ly", giving it an adverbial quality. Adverbs are used to modify actions and, while not necessarily emphatic, may offer a sense of stress or urgency. "We ate quickly.", "She drove speedily about town."
Considering this, it is easier to see why "literally" is misused with such frequency. Still, I prefer its literal definition.
Popular misuse of "literally" has been similarly appropriated in American neo-descriptive language. Yet, where "random" succeeds in a slang context, "literally" fails. This is because when misused, it is, by definition, used in a directly contradictory way. So why is it so frequently misused? Most people could probably tell you its true definition, yet that hasn't prevented this phenomenon.
Perhaps it is because "literally" is now used to create emphasis on a predicate rather than clarify it. For example: "I was so hungry, I literally could have eaten a horse." Here, "literally" is meant to intensify the degree of hunger, as if the (ironically) figurative expression wasn't sufficient, rather than to mean with certainty that one could truly consume an entire horse from extreme hunger. Marshall and I have agreed that the word "literally" owns certain phonetic and linguistically prosodic properties that instigate this error.
1. It has four syllables with the stress occurring on the first, like other emphatic words, "seriously" and "actually". Three syllable emphatic words like, "totally" and "honestly" also contribute.
2. It ends in "ly", giving it an adverbial quality. Adverbs are used to modify actions and, while not necessarily emphatic, may offer a sense of stress or urgency. "We ate quickly.", "She drove speedily about town."
Considering this, it is easier to see why "literally" is misused with such frequency. Still, I prefer its literal definition.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Crunch n' Munch? Cracker Jacks? They're Both Two Lanes of Salty-Sweet on the Delicious Highway
I took the day to become a better, more disciplined person. I only ate two, maybe three pieces of halloween candy, and I only told four lies, (which were mostly for the recipients' benefit). Long gone are the days in which the if-you-please approach lingers and fizzles. No, that all ended when I realized my fantasy basketball team, The Sasquatchers, wasn't as competitive as I planned or hoped. Somethings might be worth giving up after all. Hey, do you think my DVR recorded 30 tonight? I hope so too.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Forest Anthony
Lets all give a round of a applause for our main man Forest Anthony for making this whole past week more interesting. He looks like Andrew McCarthy, has a great shoe collection and taught me that ordering a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger with sourdough bread is almost the same thing as an actual Sourdough Jack, but about two dollars less expensive. He made friends with over half of Arizona and won just about every free female heart with his "aw-shucks" charm. He never got to play foursquare, but I have a feeling he'd be good at it. He hunted and killed deadly scorpions. He fashioned his own swim wear out of a t-shirt. He donated plasma to those in need. He has an almost-visible mustache. He even gave me gas money. What a guy. He most likely has returned safely to Provo by now, so thanks to everyone who contributed to the "Save the Forest" campaign/cause. God Bless Forest Anthony.
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